Hang in there baby, I'm the grain of sand becoming the pearl



10.14.02 - 8:27pm - Blah and Blah and Blah blah

God, I feel like I never left this place.

I had to come in to work on Saturday. It was do to checkout for an enhancement they put in. Basically, I had to check things in the system and make sure nothing had broken, then give an "Okay" so they could finish it. If I'd found things broken they'd have had to pull the code.

But anyway...since the whole program had to run before I did the checkout, it was scheduled for 4pm on Saturday. Which, was annoying enough. My boss called me at 11am or so and let me know that it was running slowly so we were looking at 6-7pm. Whee. Then he called me at 5 an said it was set that we'd be there for 7pm and start it then. I got here at 6:30pm because I like to be early. Anywho, the job still ran slowly so we (my boss was here to give the officiall "call" after I cleared things) actually didn't get to start checkout until 8pm. Thankfully instead of the hour planned we decided to do it for a half hour and everything looked OK so we gave the heads up and were out of here by 8:45.

It's just...if I have to come in on a Saturday I'd rather drag myself in hella early and get it out of the way than have my evening broken up. Plus as late as it was it seems so much more recent so I really feel like I didn't have a weekend, even though I had yesterday off entirely.

And why does it seem like I only have the ability to work hard at cleaning on Sundays? It's the only day I can seem to get significant work done. I did a LOT yesterday. The whole first floor of the apartment is pretty much clean. There's still stuff that needs to go to the dumpster and stuff that needs to go to storage but at least that's all sorted out and junk is picked up and floor is vacuumed and all that fun stuff. :) Now to tackle the upstairs. Eeeeep! That involves lots of laundry, of course. And finding places for clothes and junk where we don't have much storage! :) But it can be done. And then I have to clean the bathroom within an inch of its life because I don't want my friends knowing what an utter slob I am when I have my party. Not that they don't know already, but I'd rather have it confined to their imaginations and not staring them in the face. :)

It's really great to have clean spaces in the apartment...it's just so hard to maintain! I have kept the kitchen pretty good all week. I'm proud of that. A dish rarely sits in the sink before getting into the dishwasher. Floor's still nice and shiny. Countertop's clean. Happy happy. :) Dining table's still clean and covered in candles and placemats. Everything's looking great! (Of course neat freak friends will probably see the same spaces and think they're messy and cluttered...it's all a matter of perspective. I'm proud of the work I've done.)

*****


It's weird. I've watched a lot of football in the past 5 or 6 weeks. However long it's been going on. And I don't know if I can say I LIKE it now...I'd always rather watch something else...but I'm finding I respect it. I've always wanted to see more sportsmanship in team sports. I get irritated at the fighting in hockey, the attitudes in baseball, the really bad attitudes in basketball and knocking folks over. I always just want to at least see someone offer a hand to the guy from the other team who's on the floor and help him up. Just make an effort to diffuse the hostility.

And I realized while watching football this weekend...particularly the Packers against the Patriots...that these people for the most part actually treat each other with respect and often friendliness. Brett Favre was hugging and shaking hands with Patriots members on the way back from a play. I saw guys from one team helping the guys from the other team up. I saw someone choose to tap a guy on the helmet since he was already down...they had to touch him to stop the play but they could have jumped on him and risked hurting him but didn't because they didn't have to.

It's just weird...to find the respectful attitudes I've been dying to see...expressed in a sport I've never even liked. :)

Paul is determined to turn me into a football fan. :) I can tell he already likes watching it with me. He likes my unique take on the game. :) Like rooting for the people with the prettier outfits. Or finding my own names for parts of the uniform. Like "diaper scrunchies" for the type of sleeve they have, or "chinderwear" for the type of chinstrap. (I didn't make chinderwear up, it's from an old skit on a comedy show, but it still amuses him. :) ) And I make up voiceovers when you can see the coaches talking but can't hear them. I make Paul giggle. :)

*****


I look really cute today and no one's really around to see it! :) Got a red and black thing going on...black dress, black nylons, black shoes, really pretty dark garnety colored blouse over the dress, silver and garnet ring that I love, silver garnet and onyx pendant that I also love and looks great with the outfit. And I'm wearing lipstick that matches really well. I just feel pretty, and it's been a long time since I've felt that. I'm really irritated with myself and my body lately. I can't seem to lose weight and I do nothing but gain. It's in little increments, yes, but it still adds up to my getting fatter and not getting any closer to my goal. I seem to have lost the ability to say no to myself and others when it comes to food. I enjoy food so much that I don't want to cut back. It was a lot easier when I was alone but I LIKE eating with Paul. It's so hard to balance everything. If only I wasn't too lazy to get some exercise. I love the pool we have access to but it's in the other building which is a walk across a street and and and and I know I shouldn't be so lazy but it's a pain to walk a fair distance to get to the pool.

*****


The stock market is giving me a heart attack. I know, I'm supposed to just put my money in my mutual funds and forget about it for 25 years. But it's really hard to when I see that I've already lost thousands of dollars instead of being UP like they said I should be. Damn stupid icky market. I'm sure if I leave it in there and don't futz with it it WILL be nice in 25 years. But it's really hard to read the statements and not want to cry. I'm supposed to retire on this someday, yo! Get working on mating and creating little baby dollars!

*****


Less than two weeks until our party! I'm nervous!! But excited. We still need to pin down the menu and decorate the place. I wanted it clean before I did any decorating. I'm just happy to finally be having some people over and getting to introduce our kitties to "other people." :)

*****


I have no money today. I got to work and thought about getting breakfast. Then I was like "oh no" when I realized I had forgotten to get the wad of money out of my jeans to put in my purse. So I was annoyed that I'd have to go to the ATM. Until I realized I couldn't do that because my wallet happened to be in the pocket of my suede jacket which happened to be in the coat closet at home. So I have no wallet, no money, and no license. Which makes me nervous because I hate driving without my license. Which itself is pretty silly right now because it's expired so I'm driving illegally anyway. I suck on so many levels.

I bought myself breakfast out of the vending machine with coins I keep in my desk drawer. I'll probably end up doing the same for lunch. I'm too chicken to go to the cafeteria and pay in coins there. It seems mean to make them count it. Ah well. :)

I'm so bored here at work today. I don't know why. I can't concentrate. I just want to be home and tackling cleaning the bedroom. How weird is that.

Um. And now I'm home. But not cleaning. Went out to dinner and shopped. Wheeee.


missed it - get on with it
Recent Entries

Stayin' Alive - 11.03.03 , 10:52 a.m.
Yes, she's alive - 03.07.03 , 6:11 p.m.
Breastiges - 10.16.02 , 6:56pm
Blah and Blah and Blah blah - 10.14.02 , 8:27pm
Back in the Saddle Again - 10.11.02 , 5:15pm

Sign my guestbook! Pweeze?




My CDs

My Shows

Lyrics

 **

**

**

**

**





--Current--Older--Email--Diaryland--